The cow or the grass

Recently I have been thinking a lot about food. For those of you who know me you know this isn't a shock. However I have been thinking about healthy food. I eat very few meat products. My diet is mostly sugar and fat and that's not a good choice. Its not that I have anything against the big cow or chicken they just don't taste great to me, they bore me. My boyfriend and I have been eating out daily for the past few months, needless to say it has been hurting our wallets and our belly's. We aren't married and won't live together until we get married so cooking a meal for two is hard when you are doing it in other people's kitchens. All of this eating out got us thinking how we don't know what is in our food, we aren't told or even able to understand half of the chemicals used to "preserve" our yummy treats so that being said, should we be eating it? This morning my answer is no. I think we should change our diet, start finding protein in other sorces, buy fresh fruits and veggies from a local farm and cook it weekly. It will probally save us both a lot of money and maybe even a few years on our lives. So for now I am going to research and understand what this change means but I am looking forward to eating food and feeling the way God intended us to feel.

spring cleaning

I walk to the refrigerator and stare blankly inside. I see nothing there that is considered healthy. I see cheesecake and potato salad some left over hot dogs. I want to eat I am hungry or am I just sad or lonely or bored? What does any of this have to do with God? All of it. I have begun to see in the passed few years that there is not a choice I make that doesn't involve Him. Example, what I eat. I am hungry but I am also a little depressed now do I turn that into prayer while having a salad or do I go for the cake and sit in my bed? Everything you do from the minute you wake has a direct line to God and in turn back to you. I have been forced to see this in these past few weeks. I had a case of the winter blues whether it was because of the weather or my relationship or my job or family whatever the case I was down so I ate, a lot 25 pounds of spare tire in my mid section a lot. I also stopped praying as much because in my spare time from eating I was asleep. Two o'clock in the afternoon I was out cold and could not figure out why. The past few days it has been 89 and sunny, I went to the beach and felt the sun touch my body for the first time in months, I let it burn just to feel something greater then me. This something greater of course is God, He was ever so gently saying "wake up, its time to come home". I have been away from Him and my "home" all winter so now that He has shaken my soul into spring I see how much I really need Him. I need Him to help me make the right choice in food, clothes, jobs, cars, family, relationships, everything. I need Him to kick my back side sometimes and ask me in that Fatherly way what am I thinking ? So here comes spring and here I go off to the gym with rosary in hand. A little spring cleaning is needed on the soul just as much as the house.

Wake up America

When I was little I woke up often in the night with the sense of fear creeping deep within my bones. The only remedy for this was to dive deeper into my covers and say Hail Mary's until I fell asleep. Recently as an adult I have had this same fear the difference now is that going deeper under my covers wont help.The "monster under the bed" has changed from inviable to the face of our nations president. The health care bill has me shaken to my core. I am worried for my rights, I am worried for my parents, grandparents, brother and sisters. The government has already started to outlaw certain foods BC they deem them unhealthy so how far are we from the law makers getting rid of certain people BC they are unhealthy or "defective"? I would like to say something to all for my Pro-Choice friends; You believe that your body is your right, you can choose what to do with it, what to put in it and take out of it. You do not think that God has the right to tell you what to do even though He made you. So explain to me, what is going to happen when the government tells you that even though you made your CHOICE to keep the child you are going to have they have over ruled that CHOICE because your child is not perfect it has down syndrome or a sugar problem or will be blind or deaf. Your CHOICE will be taken away from you because of our new health care plan. I hope we all realize that the difference between God and the government is that God will NOT impede on your free will, but the government will. I am scared brothers and sister. I am scared for my parents future, my future, my future children, that is if America lasts that long.

Dreams may come true

I always have the strangest dreams. They never really make sense and there is usually a theme of fear or murder in them. I have stopped paying attention to what I dream about I wake up, shower and go about my day just laughing off the oddities my mind created. However last night I had a dream that stayed with me. I was in the kitchen at my house, my grandmother and my uncle were there with me, my uncle, whom as far as I know has no religious affiliation, turns to me and says " I want to be the bible I want to eat it, love it, and be as close as a person can be to it." I then say ; " Don't you see, Jesus is the bible, He is the word of God, He came and preached to us the Gospels, He came to be the bread of life, He gave up his body and blood for us in the Eucharist and there we can eat Him, we can consume Him , when we do that we are consuming the bible, we are as close to the Word of God as you can be. In those moments when we are receiving Him we build the most intimate relationship, we go home to our Maker. " At this point in the dream my grandmother asks me what in the world I am talking about and then I wake up. I do not know why I recalled this dream so vividly but I felt like The Holy Spirit wanted me to share it. Please do not misunderstand me in the statement I made in the dream, I still think reading the bible is important, I think we need to do it daily and use it as the powerful tool that it is. But do not forget the rosary is scriptural too there are many ways we can reflect on Scripture.

The Best

The best in people. I have been thinking a lot this lent about seeing the "best in people". I know it is hard to find that "best' sometimes. When I am in line at some store and the person behind me is making loud annoyed noises at how many things I have to pay for or when I am waiting to receive confession and someone is complaining about how long the line is or how long the priest takes with each person or when people I am waiting for or meeting are late or taking their time and we have to be somewhere. These things make me crazy, they make me want to tell these people to hurry up, shut up, suck it up and be happy, but that is not fair. That is not what Jesus would do and it is not what I should be doing, Instead I have started to offer up these little moments, I say a prayer for whatever is causing them to be short with others and I hope and pray that when the time comes that I am short and annoyed, and trust me its often I am no saint, that someone is praying for me. Maybe these prayers will change things, all of us will come a little closer to Him in those moments and that would be a grace. That would be us being like Christ and is that not what we are all called for?

Food Food Food

I love food. I cant help it. There is something programmed in my brain that sets off fireworks when I smell garlic, or give me a drooling mouth every time I walk past a bakery. These things just happen so I have come to believe God made me this way, I better use it! At the moment I am fasting for Lent from all sugar as well as all alcohol. This may seem easy for most but for me all I want to do is curl up with a glass of dark rich red wine and a chocolate lava cake! However feeling the grace I get when my belly growls and I can offer that up for people less fortune or when I see that candy bar in the grocery store line and I know not eating that may help save a soul in purgatory. Those feelings make me center back to God and all He does and is doing for me. Those feelings make me a tiny bit more grateful of His love. So I think after Lent ends I wont go back to my normal glass of wine with dinner or chocolate on a weekday afternoon. I will offer that up throughout the year for all those who suffer for all those who do not know God as well as they would like to, for all.

A little shout out on the book I just read; "The girl in the orange dress" written by Margot Starbuck.

Lately it has been snowing here, a lot. I love the snow when it is falling down in mystical little flakes but as soon as it stops I am ready for it to find a new home. I wish we could scoop it up and send it out to sea, however it does make for great reading time. I was just given a book from my friend and author , Amy Julia Becker{ her book ,Penelope Ayers can be bought through her website; http://www.amyjuliabecker.com/}. The story Amy Julia handed over to me is written by another fabulous author, Margot Starbuck{ http://www.margotstarbuck.com/} her story is a spiritual memoir. A long journey to find "the Father that never fails." I too have gone down this path and I know it is not a easy one. There are times of betrayal , hardship, emotional pain and sorrows that make you wonder if you will ever be a happy person again. Yet, I feel this is such a needed road to go down to be truly one with yourself and God. I know I would not be the strong woman I am now if I had not stopped to listen to our Heavenly Father for a moment, if I did not swallow my pride for a brief second and frankly , shut up. Margot paints a picture for us that is so familiar that I found myself crying and laughing all at once. It was like she was in my head on many occasions and just captured my thoughts in a more articulate way. I wont say too much on the book because I do not want to spoil it, I simply suggest you run out and buy it now. You wont be sorry, this story is truly one of grace, love , compassion and hilarity.